Valentines is Bullshit.

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Valentine’s Day is tomorrow, and I just want to take a minute and talk about the most loved, and hated, holiday.

If you’re in a new relationship, you’ve probably been anticipating this holiday since last March, and dreaming about the 2 dozen long stem roses, heart shaped box of chocolates, cuddly teddy bear, and dinner at your favorite restaurant (at 7pm of course, the most popular dining time…hope you booked this in December guys!) You obviously have to compete with your other “taken” girlfriends, because you and your man are the “power couple” of 2014, and today is the day to prove it.

If you’ve been dating for a while, you’re expecting that little blue box, and a bottle of Dom to celebrate. You’ll need your mom, dad, sister, and BFF’s to be there to celebrate with you after he pops the big question, so he’ll need to go ahead and fly them in. Oh, and since Kim Kardashian had a full symphony and an entire stadium when Kanye popped the question, your man better have something equally as amazing planned. If Ryan Gosling could get on one knee and ask for him, that would do the trick.

Married men have to raise the bar every year, so that full day at the spa that he treated you to last year just isn’t going to cut it. New diamond stud earrings, the 2014 Range Rover Sport, and that Prada handbag you’ve been eyeing are sure to be on the short-list. And don’t you dare bring me a new car if it doesn’t have a giant red bow on it, because I can’t instagram a photo of a plain old car.

If you’re single, this day sucks more than you expect your 50th birthday will. You can’t stay home and watch reruns of Sex & The City and kick back tequila shots without your non-single friends thinking you’re suicidal. If you go out with your fellow single ladies, everyone looks at you like you’re a walking cliche. It’s lose-lose. If you’re reading this, you still have time to get on an airplane and fly to mexico…just do it.

Ladies, it’s TOO MUCH!! It’s too much pressure, and too much money being spent on dumb things that should never cost that much. A $20 teddy bear? Why does a grown woman need a teddy bear?! $150 roses. (FYI: They’re $20 every other day of the year.) A heart shaped box of chocolates…and the chocolate is usual gross! We all take one bite out of each just to see if it’s as disgusting as the last. We expect sappy cards that say things that we would NEVER say in real life. For example: “We are two souls sharing a single thought, two hearts sharing a single beat, you are the light of my life!” If a guy says that out loud to you, check for signs of a stroke.

If you’re new to my blog then you’re probably reading all this and thinking “This chick is DEFINITELY single, that’s why she hates Valentines”…I’m not. So lets talk about my husband.

1000833_10201039810613804_1278907451_nMy husband and I have been together for nearly 10 years, and we’ve never celebrated Valentines Day…but we do celebrate being in love all day err day! He doesn’t have to prove he loves me one day out of the year, because he shows me in small, thoughtful ways, all year.

He buys me flowers, but not for any “Hallmark holiday”, just because he’s at the grocery store and knows I like fresh flowers in the house.

He makes me breakfast in bed. Ok, that’s a lie…but he DOES let me sleep in on the weekends, and entertains our 2 year old until at least 9:30, at which time he brings her into our room and lets her jump on me until I get my lazy butt up. He’ll usually make me coffee too, so that counts as breakfast.

He’s an amazing dad! He’s never been the “I don’t do diapers” kind of dad. He gets on the floor and plays, cooks Mac & Cheese like Emeril Lagasse (BAM!), and literally races me up the stairs to get Camryn up from naps when we hear her making noises over the monitor. He’s involved. He appreciates his time with her. He is teaching her the way a real man should treat her.

He’s dependable. When he says he’ll fix the garage door, I know I can count on him…to call a repair man. Seriously though, he’s always there when I need him, and he’s never, ever flakey.

He works really hard. He’s planning for our future, and he’s allowing me to be a stay-at-home-mom.

He’s honest. Always. Even if that honesty is saying “Babe, your breath is kickin’!” This is ROMANCE people. :-)

He kills spider. This is an important trait ladies.

He doesn’t complain. When he’s eating healthy and hitting the gym every day, he doesn’t complain when I lay in bed at night eating hot Cheetos and ice cream. I actually thanked him for this last week, because I know if the tables were turned I’d be pissed that he was tempting me, and would absolutely kick him out of the bed.

He’ll let me lead. He gives me full reign when I want it. I’ve decorated, redecorated, and then switched out a few chairs, lamps, and pillows (also called redecorating) in our house about 100 times. He hates it…but he lets me continue with this madness because he knows I love it. He knows when to take a step back and let me do my thing.

He makes me laugh. I usually start laughing because he’s laughing, and his laugh is hysterical. He’s usually laughing because I’ve done something klutzy. This article makes us both laugh until we’re crying.

He’s easy to look at. Ladies, this is another important trait. If you have babies with an ugly person, your babies will also be ugly. (I’m KIDDING!! But for reals, nobody likes an ugly baby. TOTALLY JOKING!!) ;-)

He’s a genuinely nice person. I can’t think of anyone who dislikes my husband. He’s respectful, and kind, and extremely open-minded. He always approaches me with kindness and, even if we disagree about something, he’s careful with his words and is thoughtful in his argument.

This list could go on and on, and some of you might already be considering checking me for signs of a stroke, so I’ll end on this note. He’s not a drunk. He doesn’t do drugs. He doesn’t sleep around. (and 10 years later, he’s still a stud muffin) Happy Valentines to me!

I had no intentions of this post becoming so long and preach-ish, I just wanted to remind everyone that tomorrow isn’t about what you are gifted, and it shouldn’t be a competition. Tomorrow is Friday (WOOHOO!) and it’s also Valentines day, but it doesn’t have to play out like a fairy tale. Tell the people you love “I love you” and appreciate being told “I love you too” and then do it again the next day, and the day after that, and so on. If you like buying gifts, then go ahead, but don’t allow yourself to feel pressured to have to, or put that pressure on your spouse. Don’t be a valentine-zilla.

For me and the hubs, we’ll spend V-day watching House of Cards. Ohhh yeeaahhhh baaaabbbyyy, it’s back!

XO – Samantha

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